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So wow look at this an update from me. Shocking I know.
So anyway I guess I'll update, at least this time it'll be happier than my last one's have been. Well at least some parts will be.
So happy stuff first or should I do the shitty stuff? Meh whatever. So happy I guess. I have my best friend's back. Yes both of them. Liz and I ran into one another in the hallway, the joys of living in the same building as your bestests. So yes her and I talked, and apologized and everything seems to be alright between her and I. Which is a good thing, I don't get to see my other bestest much. Not that I blame her, she's got a beautiful baby girl and she's happily involved so I can't really fault her. So anyway that's the news on the best friend front.
I went to Harmony's birthday the other night, well I guess it was last night that it happened. I was so lucky that Sami could do a dress for me. It was a great night even if Steve wasn't there. I would have loved to have had him there but I know he's not into the whole Black Tie affair thing.
Speaking of Steve, I've been missing him. I know what you're thinking, how can you miss someone you're dating, especially when you live in the same city. Well it's pretty simple actually. He's been spending his nights over at Brent's, and I'm at home with my dog, alone. I haven't really seen him much since we got back from the Hamptons. I have no idea what's going on with him, he seems distant or something. I know I'm sure as hell not going to see him today, not with it being Superbowl Sunday.
So I checked my mail the other day and just about died or gave birth right on the spot. I had the shock of my life when I went through the stacks of bills. Steve would probably freak out if he saw what gave me that shock. I know how he feels about Blake and that's what was in the mail, a letter from Blake. I'm trying to figure out why there's a letter from him in the first place. He never cared about anything before, why should he start now? He seems to think he'll get to see Addison, there is no way in hell. It'll be over my dead body. In the letter he asked how the pregnancy was going and everything, he didn't even ask how Sami and Kayleigh were. That would have been my first thought if it were me.
Probably my last point of this entry, the hardest one for me to be writing is the fact that it's now been ten years since my mother passed away. This year is REALLY hitting me harder than normal. Maybe because it's the first year that I've been sober and clean for it. Normally I would go on a binge for the week and be drunk and completely stoned. It had been the only way I had known to get through. My dad was never any help, everytime the aniversary came up he would be in his huge ass depression and forget the rest of the world. Maybe it's hitting me hard too because I'm having Addi. I think that's about the only thing that's actually kept me sane through the last week, knowing that I want to be here for her, and I want to see her grow up and get married and have a career.
Ok now Izzy needs out and I think I need some air. I'm going to leave this and take a walk through Central. Yeah I know it's freezing and winter but I really need to do this.
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